If I don ‘t write this today while things are fresh in my meno-brain it won’t happen, so here goes…..

Where did I get to….

Wednesday we went to see the Pixies at the most excellent venue of the Halifax Piece Hall. The Piece hall is an architectural wonder rising out of the rugged industrial landscape of the area and it’s a place I’ve always loved. By day it’s full of little independent shops and galleries, with restaurants and food trucks below in the large courtyard. A new addition is a statue of feminist legend Anne Lister, her former home and estate of Shibden Hall is nearby. If you’re not familiar with Anne, please watch the excellent drama Gentleman Jack starring national treasure Suranne Jones, and written by the legend that is Sally Wainwright of Happy Valley and Last Tango In Halifax fame. To do as Anne did, in those times, and do it brilliantly I might add, I can’t imagine what she must have been up against.

The Piece Hall by night was a new experience for me, and it might be the best small venue I’ve been to for a gig. Parking was plentiful and easy first of all, access was easy, there was a tonne of independent food traders, from Bao buns to burgers operating from food trucks in the courtyard. So many loos! There was live signing of the gig for hearing impaired visitors, and a large raised platform for wheelchair users which had an excellent view of the stage. The gig was sold out , but there was still space, it didn’t feel claustrophobic as these things can. At the opposite corner to the stage are some raised seating areas, with stairs that wrap all around that side of the courtyard providing access to the higher level around the edge. I was stood at the top of these steps and I can honestly say it was the best view I have ever had (being 5ft 5), at any concert I’ve ever been to.

There is a slight caveat. Next to where I was standing was one of a handful of proper raised benches. There was a couple seated there, and the lady had her leg in a full cast to above her knee. So had clearly arrived early so they could sit somewhere and she could stretch out her leg a bit as she needed to. I was doing my best to block off access to the front of the bench so that no-one could accidentally trip over or kick her cast while trying to get past. With about 10 minutes to show time, 2 middle aged guys decided to just push straight in front of me and ask the couple if they could stand in front of them. The girl obviously gestured to her cast and said no they couldn’t. Instead of then leaving, one strode over her cast and back, really invading her space to get past, and proceeded to just stand directly in front of me. There was a time when I’d just accept I had been once again shafted by an inconsiderate bastard, but not today! I stuck my head between them, and said, it would be really nice if you moved. We’ve been here for over an hour, I’m only 5ft 5 and I never get a good view, plus the lady with the cast needs space. Lots of chuntering ensued, his mate was mortified and the arsehole did actually concede, but not without muttering something to the girl with the cast about “your friend”. At the end of the gig, a lady standing just behind me said, excuse me, well done you for asking them to move, I’ve never had a view as good as this. It felt good my friend, it felt good. Stand your ground, and white middle aged men, (because it’s always you – I’m sorry it just is), don’t arrive late and barge in front of people because it’s really self entitled and just downright rude! The Pixies were ace btw, absolutely no chat and according to the review I read, got through 28 songs. Good skills.

Thursday was Aladdin at the Alhambra Theatre in Bradford. It’s a theatre I know well, one of the only ones in the area that gets the big West End touring productions, that will take up residency for the Summer. It’s a beautiful theatre. When I lived in the UK I would go 2-3 times a year maybe, either to the Grand Theatre in Leeds or here. Aladdin is one of my faves and I hadn’t seen the stage production so was really looking forward to it. It’s all about the Genie really same as the film, Aladdin is kind of superfluous to requirements.

We decided to try to find something to do before the show, and allowed time for something to eat too, so we headed to an indoor archery place which was surrounded by boarded up shops and looked like something out of a Blade movie. No one else there but us, blaring techno, what have we done….. But this being said it was a lot of fun.

When I was in my late teens and a part-time goth, I spent many a night out in Bradford and never gave it a second thought. I went to college in Little Germany for a time at the Chamber of Commerce buildings, would go to gigs at St Georges Hall. While Bradford did feel like Leeds poor relation at times, it felt safe. Jesus, what has happened in recent years. The walk from the archery place was horrific, like walking through scenes in the Last of Us. Boarded up shops, some smashed in, some covered in graffiti, a very apparent homelessness problem, we were asked for money a couple of times. People with clear mental health issues shouting in doorways, youths speeding about on modified motorised pushbikes that felt vaguely threatening. The thought of wandering around there at night in full Rocky Horror Show fancy dress as we used to felt not just inadvisable but dangerous. This was about 6pm on a random Thursday afternoon.

We decided to go to Brewdog for something to eat, really close to the theatre. As we approached it, the entrance was completely smashed in, and there was a forlorn paper notice telling patrons to use the entrance on another street. In the absence of literally any other place to eat that wasn’t terrifying, and I’d rather eat broken glass than give Tim Martin any of my money by eating in a Wetherspoons, we walked around to the other side of the building. `only to be accosted by another person for money, and find that Brewdog is closed on Thursdays…. At this point our only option was the restaurant in the Theatre, and let me tell you, walking into the foyer of the theatre felt like entering the safety of an Embassy in a war zone. Massive thank you to the front of house staff that allowed us to order after service should have ended, was only an hour away from curtain-up by this point. We apologised profusely and explained we had been walking for ages and trying to find somewhere to eat. He said, yep, that’s Bradford, thank goodness I only work here. All of the roads are currently up, and even the Media Museum, (which I’ve always enjoyed), is closed for a major refurb ahead of Bradford being city of culture 2025. The city is going to need more than a few new kerb stones to fix this dystopian nightmare I can tell you.

All of this said, the show was great, the genie as ever, stole the show, and my consistent niggling anxiety throughout the performance that we wouldn’t get an Uber afterwards was unfounded. It came in about 3 minutes.

Friday, I said goodbye to Mum in the morning, which I always hate, and then met a friend in Leeds for some food. Massive mention to Von, who came to pick me up and drop me off and is a total absolute legend. Love you bud!

Had a second Dagel, which was just as good as the first, and both my friend and I didn’t manage to speak to each other, except for expletives, until they were devoured in pretty short order. Back to White Cloth Hall for more amazing food and we just took over a corner for the next few hours. Our afternoon was sadly punctuated by some news about someone that I was fortunate to only know peripherally but liked immensely, and was very close to both my friend and my husband. I won’t elaborate further because it isn’t my news to share, but just to say, live your life, eat the donut, use the good bath stuff. Tomorrow is not a guarantee. Enough now.

Friday night we had checked out of our hotel and de-camped to my sisters where we had a most excellent curry and a relatively early night because Saturday was the main event of my Nephew’s wedding.

Saturday seemed to go by in a flash. Big Sis had arranged a coach to pick us all up, and we were able to broadcast the ceremony to my Mum in her care home over Skype which was great. The food was most excellent Fish and chips with curry sauce and buttered bread cake, yes!!! I got to hang out with some of my most favourite people and happily Time-warped and Cotton Eyed Joe-ed the night away until getting home on the coach again just after midnight and into my birthday. How I woke up without a hangover on Sunday I don’t know, but it seems the 2 pints of Guinness amuse-bouche followed by Jack and Diet Coke seems to work for me.

Then later in the afternoon we headed airport-wards and checked into the lounge before our flight home. We were in the more premium lounge because there was a 15% off offer when I booked that made it pretty much the same price as the other one. The airport itself was utter carnage, too hot, too loud, too busy. As a result, lots of people were trying to pay on the door to get into the lounges and without a pre-booking they were having to turn people away. The more premium lounge is table service for the meals as well as a buffet for cheese and meats, soup, snacks and cakes. Had a really nice pepperoni pizza in the relative calm and watched the planes take off in the wind with interest. Thankfully our takeoff was fine and for once we had no delays so we got home (actually into the house), just after 10.00pm. A strange and knackering birthday but very glad to be home and back with my babies. I’ve been forgiven for leaving by all but one cat, she’s still making me work for it. Catisfactions, (salmon flavour) are helping.

In home news, our roofers are working hard to fix all our cumulative storm damage and the slipped edge tiles that we’ve had for ages. To all of those preachy types on Facebook that tell people off for not using registered French artisans, I would say that the date on the devis for the ridge tiles as supplied by our neighbours and registered French artisans is now 5 years old and despite us seeing them regularly at village functions since and we’re all on very cordial terms, no work has been carried out. Given we now have all of our hail damaged guttering from the tornado to fix, a downpipe to reattach and the barn roof to repair from storm Louis, we cannot afford to leave the roof timbers exposed going in to the winter, so we’ve gone with an English roofer, that comes recommended and is doing brilliant things. I think I’m quite patient, and I’ve come to terms with and expect things to take longer here, but sometimes, you just need the thing to get done within a decade at least.

That’s about it for now. I think.

TTFN xxx